Cont.

I don't know how to impress girls like others, I do not have the touch of love potion in my speech or my hand. What i do have is my ear for you to release your problem, my mouth to give you advice, my hand to help you to gain that strength to not give up that easily. That innocent girl i have met and know her well. As we have have conversation for a few years. We may have argument and disagreement on thing but i let her win. Without winning her heart is like getting her in your arms. One time i did told her that most boys will do stupid thing just to get the attention of his crush/lover. I think is only me who will say that because i have watch too much dramatic movie. These few month is hard for me as she is sitting a major exam and i could not talk to her, we can talk the hold day and not know what time is it. We Whats App each other from time to time. There was one time  She as me who do i like or who is your crush in ur college or anyone that i like. So i sort of told her a lie that i like someone else and was not dare to tell her that i like her, That time i do not have guts or the balls to tell her or confess.    

The Innocent Girl

She the innocent one who I have feeling for. 

She is the want who change my life around, when I look at her she makes me smile. 

I am not very sure whether did I make her smile. I may look not handsome, clever or anything near to it. 

I feel like she has something special in her. I knew her for few years already. Now I look back at our conversation, I feel stupid to the things I have said to her, the wrong thing that I have done to her and thing are not suppose to do. Now I realised that, I have done too much or many pervert thing to her. I feel very guilty to her whenever I face, I forced myself to put a smile on my face whenever I see her. 

Just last few days I confessed to her I am very in love with her. I told her that, I may not like other boys who have all the good feature. I am more like a person who have a fat tummy, no muscle, and  not looking cool. I know that my time is short as I have dream about my death, it is very complicated to explain. That was y I ignoring her for one day. On that day itself I received a message from her, asking me y am I ignoring her. So I explain to her of what happen. I remember once I was fetch her back home and requested me to bring her to have a late lunch. I brought her to MCD as requested from her, she told me did not have enough of money, I should have brought her in to MCD and treat her. I have make a mistake for not being to have a good lunch. She only bought a vanilla ice cream. There had been so many time that I want to tell her but I do not have the guts or the balls to confessed to her. Every day for the past few years I have be thinking of her day and night. As she has grown taller and taller about to reach my height, I can see that she have grown more matured and still have the innocent look at her face. I think I have expressed enough. As I know she may or may not accept that she is still pretty, beautiful, innocent  smart, caring and many other good things that I can day to her. But not about myself.

She the innocent one who I have feeling for. 

She is the want who change my life around, when I look at her she makes me smile. 

I am not very sure whether did I make her smile. I may look not handsome, clever or anything near to it. 

I feel like she has something special in her. I knew her for few years already. Now I look back at our conversation, I feel stupid to the things I have said to her, the wrong thing that I have done to her and thing are not suppose to do. Now I realised that, I have done too much or many pervert thing to her. I feel very guilty to her whenever I face, I forced myself to put a smile on my face whenever I see her. 

Just last few days I confessed to her I am very in love with her. I told her that, I may not like other boys who have all the good feature. I am more like a person who have a fat tummy, no muscle, and  not looking cool. I know that my time is short as I have dream about my death, it is very complicated to explain. That was y I ignoring her for one day. On that day itself I received a message from her, asking me y am I ignoring her. So I explain to her of what happen. I remember once I was fetch her back home and requested me to bring her to have a late lunch. I brought her to MCD as requested from her, she told me did not have enough of money, I should have brought her in to MCD and treat her. I have make a mistake for not being to have a good lunch. She only bought a vanilla ice cream. There had been so many time that I want to tell her but I do not have the guts or the balls to confessed to her. Every day for the past few years I have be thinking of her day and night. As she has grown taller and taller about to reach my height, I can see that she have grown more matured and still have the innocent look at her face. I think I have expressed enough. As I know she may or may not accept that she is still pretty, beautiful, innocent  smart, caring and many other good things that I can day to her. But not about myself.

Problem

Is it true that she is using me to get what she wan?

Is it that pretty face of hers is just to lure you in to her scam?

Is it her whole life is just a cover up to her real life?

I could not have the answer to all these question which doesn't has the answer to it.I wonder my life was the right path to go or the wrong path that I have taken. I know sometime love is blind but am I blind to love her and not other people that love me. We have chatting lot from time to time. Is she using this conversation to have what she wan. Most the time when the conversation end, on the next day she forget about our conversation. The question now to me is that whether she is using me or I am blind towards her. I wish I could turn back time and change all these problem that I am facing. When there are problem, we use that problem to change to a better us. From that problem that we are facing, we could be stronger than ever. One problem at a time will make u strong one step closer.

Yesterday was an awesome day for me as I have able to get to spent some time with my girl. We spent time together after her school. Past few days ago, I ask her out for lunch together and she said YES. I was too excited till I forgot abt the day to meet her after school. But luckily I was just in time to meet her as she was late as well. When we arrive to our lunch date, we start looking for food and deciding what to do the whole day together. We have list out some suggestion on what we can do here together. There were few things that we could do here which is Watching Movie, Escape Room, and many other more. So we decided to watch movie first which is The Valentine Deadpool. The show was very romantic and sweet this movie could even make you cry at the end. After that we when to escape room to play the game. The game was very difficult but it doesn't stop us from finishing it in time to win the prize. The prize wasn't that big but it gave another change to watch movie together again. When I looked at my watch, I realize that it is almost 7pm. I rush and fetch her home before her mum find out that she has gone out. We didn't want to let anyone else to know we are together beside her brother who is very supportive. Her brother help us to cover from her mum from knowing that we were gone. It was very lucky that her mum didn't know about the outing. I send my last love heart to her as I leave her house. It was a very memorable day together Which I would not forget.